Way too cold

Even though I have not been out in it. I've seen the snow through my window. Snow has been on the ground ever since Christmas Eve. And it's been really, really cold. This weekend may be the last and worst of it, at least I'm hoping.

Is not as though I go out that much in January anyway, I usually don't. However, in midmonth, or late month, the weather warms enough for me to go for a short outing with a friend.

My sister is smart. She lives in Naples Florida and does not usually come back to Ohio until late February or mid March warm-up. She called me yesterday to tell me it was 51° in the morning. They are used to going swimming there, doing water aerobics (with a friend) every morning. Likely, yesterday the water in the pool is heated to 85°. So they jumped in and did their aerobic exercises anyway.

She said she had to resist the temptation to turn on the heat in the house. She said the thermostat read 72°. But to her it did not feel that warm.

She even told me the dog did not want to walk and instead wanted to go back home.

No one here talks much about the weather except to say is it's cold. But I'm sure the smokers are happily a time. I don't know they have a covered shack to smoke in. But, if they don't , I feel sorry for them. It has to be really cold out just to stand and smoke.

But I'm sure they go to their cars, which would be smarter, and warmer.

A friend was supposed to visit next week but I told her to hold off until midmonth. I was afraid it would be way too cold for me to even consider going out. And even though I enjoy a visit in the facility, I would like to to go on an outing outside the facility.

I just wonder if January 2018's weather is going to warm up – anytime soon.

How to plan for company – now

I guess maybe I need to ask social services how to plan for a visitor when that visitor can only come on certain days. I don't really have a plan anymore about getting up at all, except on shower days. I didn't get a shower on Christmas because it was a Monday and they weren't prepared to give me one. The same was true of New Year's Day – another Monday.

R (a friend) wanted to visit next Monday. But I'm concerned it'll be way too cold for us to go out and maybe miserable for her to travel. I'm sure she travels other places but I don't want to worry about R being out, trying to get to me for a visit, and having problems. I suggested she move her visit to mid-January hoping the weather will warm some. Today it's -15 (real feel), and I think that's pretty cold.

Maybe as we move away from the holidays things will get better. I'm not really sure about that, but I can hope. I thought I had a routine established until they put me on the Hoyer at the beginning of November. Then, when the Hoyer they were using for me broke on 12/6 I ceased to have a plan.

Since then I have no idea what's going on. They were supposed to get new Hoyer pads right after Christmas. Maybe they got them but none of the aides have said anything about it. I don't know if they ordered the style with the toileting hole, or if any were U-shaped. But, I haven't asked, nor has anyone told me. I also wonder if the tilting Hoyer lift that broke will ever be fixed. I suppose they'll get a new lift eventually.

R suggested January 15 or 16 as possible visit days. I suggested 1/15 since I get a shower that day. I felt that way at least I'd be clean. But for some reason R said she would visit on 1/16. Now, I'm confused. Tuesdays aren't usually good days here and I have no idea why. But, I'm afraid I'll not get washed up well enough for company on Tuesday 1/16. So, I'm trying to clarify that.

I really hate worrying about being ready for company. I so seldom get it. Yet I worry about not being ready all the time. Most of my life I prepared for visitors, or company, that never showed up. I also planned for trips I never took, boyfriends I never met, and men who never became my husband. But, I never minded – because at least I was ready.

It looks like I need to write a note to social services to help me straighten my schedule out. I'm getting weak from not getting up. But, I'm getting over the sore throat I've had for over two weeks.

I wonder if I'll have things figured out before R visits in almost two weeks.

The holidays are over

My holidays got all topsy-turvy early. Because I was put on the Hoyer in November. Thanksgiving felt funny and I didn't eat with other residents as I had at my previous facility. When the Hoyer lift broke in December things got really messed up. Without enough Hoyer pads, I was never sure what day I would be up and for how long.

The facility ordered new pads but they did not get here until after Christmas. I have no idea what they ordered or if any of them are the U-shaped pads but I prefer they use. In December I missed out on two outings with friends, because of the lack of Hoyer pads to get me up and ready. That made me feel like I wasn't in control of my life at all.

I enjoy going out before and after Christmas every year. I guess I've been lucky that I've been able to do it. I also miss my sister whose now in Florida and not 50 miles away where I can call her and she can possibly just drop in. That makes me feel kind of adrift, and all alone.

I've been in my room a lot and hiding away from everyone. But being in bed is the only way I could be sure I can lie down when I'm tired and need to.

I've also had sore throat since a week before Christmas. That had me dragging.

I like to plan and planning has not been happening much lately. I've been a planner all my life and lots of my plans never came to fruition. But, at least I was prepared for just about every occurrence.

I'm kind of glad the holidays are over. I don't have to pretend to feel happy when I'm not. I don't feel like I've blended in here very well. But being without the proper equipment to lift me and move me between bed and power chair caused me to feel more of an outcast.

I think some aides here think I should just trust them to do what I need and not worry about it. But it's very difficult for me to do. I've been through a lot and I know they just don't realize it.

Perhaps in the new year I will be able to find the things that eluded me during the holidays.