The noisy man

We got a new male resident a few weeks ago and he is something. I know nothing about him. The staff are not allowed to tell and none of the residents talk much. I don't ask questions. So I only know what I hear in the hallways.

Mr. C has mostly silver and white hair. He uses a walker sometimes and other times he does not. A few times a day he is totally irate about something. I don't know where he came from; it may have been a hospital psych unit or another type of psych facility, but he wants out of here. He says he is way too restricted here. But, as a smoker he gets to go outside to smoke seven times a day.

I don't get to go out that often. Residents who don't smoke are not allowed to go out with the smokers. I guess they're afraid a resident will run away. Some residents here have been flight risks in the past. I'm sure there are a few of them now. They don't want to have to watch non-smokers and smokers at the same time. This is not a more traditional nursing home. We don't have mostly old people who have dementia and who are very near death. Although, some may be near death and have nothing visible that we think would cause imminent death. But, none of us knows when someone will die. Do we?

Anyway Mr. C was mouthing off the other day because he could not find his TV remote. It was right after breakfast when the aides were getting residents out of the dining room, and the nurses were passing medicine and sometimes being called hither and yon.

Mr. C was not getting enough attention and he spouted off. The nurse manager came out and talked with him. She told him he would have to wait. He ended up throwing his walker a few minutes later in the hallway and losing his first smoke break. He was really irate about that. But here, actions have consequences, especially if you smoke. That's one thing they can take away from you if you act up.

I have empathy for Mr. C. This is a strange place to come to and I know all about that. It's too bad there isn't a counselor here who could listen to him. Instead, therapy takes people downstairs to exercise or maybe do eye hand coordination things, like crafts. I think that's a good idea. But, therapy serves as a timeout. If there is no therapy possible, a resident must go to their room and stay there.

Phone usage here is restricted. Residents can only make so many calls out each day; it's the same for receiving them. Even though I have a Skype phone, I don't use the phone much. I use it mostly for business not for pleasure calls. I use email instead of calling. That cuts out the waiting part – which I like.

I understand why Mr. C was upset. He can't call anybody to vent because calling is on a schedule when enough staff can assist him him to call out and hand him the phone. Even if you have a cell phone, as one resident who's soon moving out does, the nurses keep it and let her use it periodically. She probably is following the same rules as all the other residents who use the facility's phone.

I know some past residents received many calls in a day. When they announced those on the PA it was noisy and redundant to hear someone called numerous times. Luckily, residents are no longer paged to the phone, and no resident gets call after call either.

On the way to the women's shower this morning, Mr. C was in the hallway sitting on the seat of his walker. He said he wanted to shower when I was finished. I could tell he wasn't happy. My aide told me she kept him out. She told him I had to be showered before breakfast, because that's the routine.

I told my aide that he might have been in a better mood if he had showered. I know it is hard when you can't do anything on the spur of the moment. I suppose people with mental and emotional problems do way too many things too fast for those around them. I guess that's why they make the residents wait. I have learned to put most of my emotions on hold, but that doesn't work all the time.

The longer Mr. C is here the more he will see the facility's system in action. He may not ever like it. But he will at some point appreciate it.