Another day WITHOUT the Hoyer

Today I was not allowed to get up. Maybe that was planned, and maybe not. They were short because an aide called off. So, that may have caused some of my troubles..

The aides wanted me to have my bowel movement in the bed pan. It is difficult for me to relax to poop on the bedpan. But that's what they wanted me to do.

The aides said they would take me to the shower and do it on the shower bed in the men's shower room. That has never happened to me before, but I was told I had to follow "Hoyer routine".

I asked them to just wash me up and let my hair go – which they did. I thought I would see if I could get them to discontinue the Hoyer, or use it to put me in the shower chair for toileting and showering. But I knew I would not get to win that fight today. I gave up showering and hair washing to be able to get up – and that did not happen.

I was not allowed to use my laptop. They thought I was being suicidal. I told them that was silly. I was just frustrated because it's unbearably sad here and I was rebelling against feeling that way.

The aides left me in the bed on the bedpan and got the rest of the the residents to breakfast. Surprisingly, I was able to get my bowels to move. It took a while and it was difficult.. As a quadriplegic, I have a hard time getting my bowels to move. I get suppositories every day which help. But, getting up helps also, and that did not happen today.

I told them I would skip breakfast – and I did. I was frustrated, had a bellyache, and just did not want it.

I asked to use my laptop but I was told no. I guess I was too much of a bad girl this morning. So I could not use my Skype phone, email, or even read the news.

It was a long day during which I did not sleep. I just laid here and watched what wasn't happening on the ceiling.

On afternoon shift nurse was kind and I was able to get set up with my laptop. And tonight I ate a bit of supper.

Since afternoon shift had a different attitude, the day looks a bit more hopeful.