Trying to be like Job

When things are going wrong in your life, it pays to remember stories in the Bible. One of those is the Book of Job. It tells the story of a well-off man and his family and what happens when God tests him to see how he reacts to negative circumstances. So, Job has to lose everything, his affluence, and his family. And yet, he still does not turn against the God who is supposedly responsible for what has happened.

Then, to make matters worse, Job's friends come to tell him how awful he looks and ask how he will never recover from what has happened to him. With friends like that, who needs enemies? But, in real life we all have some friends who would reacts like that. Whoever wrote that book, knew a lot about human nature.

As I try to ready myself for the hearing tomorrow here, I wonder if I can be a bit like Job. I have never had all he had plus a family and then lost it, like he did. So, I really have nothing to compare to his travails. But, in my own way, my situation is momentous. I feel like I'm losing my sense of identity and the life I have grown into over the last six plus years.

It's hard to explain how you feel when you're challenged. I do not feel like "individuals in this home are endangered" because of me. But, management does and that's the crux of it.

The ombudsman who will represent me asked if I wanted to do a short presentation of how I got where I am. I guess by that she means living in this nursing home 80 miles or more away from my home.

Maybe explaining it just a little will put things into perspective. But I don't know. I'm sure the hearing officer hears stories about residents all the time at hearings. I'm sure that many of them cannot even show up and speak for themselves. Perhaps few residents fight involuntary discharge. I wonder how many families would fight one for their loved one.

I sort of know I'm an atypical resident. No matter where I go it will be difficult for me to fit in. I'm a square peg in a round hole. But I'm trying to make the best of it.

I would like to tell them that what I want to do is contribute to life because I can. I don't want to let my disability, short staffing, bad attitudes, or preconceived notions keep me from doing what I love.

I love writing and keeping busy. I love telling my stories. I really think they help others.

Let's hope the facility can't quite come up to their burden of proof. I have not endangered others, and I will stand on that.